Thursday, February 18, 2010

Volume I/Part 20: "Itz ALL In The Building"

"It was all a dream, I was just escaping the scene/ How could one predict, shit would be raping my team/ Taxing my green, I mean - what the fuck have I seen/ To kiss karma on itz lips, and behave like a fiend/ Leaning left, same spot where I left stressed breath/ Leaning right, on the corner where - I test death/ Shoulder colder than the Arctic, yes I arc this so listen/ No rewind, I'm getting older, older friendships are missing..." -Mo.Jey, "Deliverance"


*SCENE 1:   "Surface Speak"


...As if my eyes had no meaning, they saw no reflection. They only saw 41 tattoos on my skin, which does not equate to a deeper look within.  The ink on my skin tells stories, beneath the surface...


"If my blood's flow could speak."


But, a blind man reading braille can see clearer than "they".  On the surface, I am a "starving" artist who made roast, mashed potatoes and mixed vegetables for dinner last night.


"You STILL think I'm starving? (LOL)"


But to me, an artists only starves when they choose not to feed their creativity.  I eat creation, 3 times a day and pray to my Creator when I arise...and when I lay me down to sleep.  On the surface, I am not a star...but underneath, a star was born many moons before you started reading this piece.


"His time is near."


But the root of it all, has never been about fame or money.  I'm honest enough to tell y'all...


"Aw, hell NAW, I don't work for free"


...but ultimately, thas not what drives me.  What drives me is well beneath the surface of my physical being.  What drives me is creating the very best albums or films I can possibly create.  For me - as an artist, my intent is to get better at what I do, every time I do it.  And I hope y'all come along for the ride to simply witness my growth.  Not just as an artist. But as a grown man...


*SCENE 2:   "HolloWood & Vine"


...and WTF!?  I'm not THAT busy that I won't respond to y'all.  LOL.

Nah, really. I'm not gonna touch on that.  Hollywood is a taj mirage (a made up term, thank you...lmao).  It ain't what people around the world THINK it is. I know...I lived in Culver City for 2.5 years. Hollywood is actually...kinda dirty.  But when you think movies, when you blink 3 times away from Kansas, with Toto in a tutu drinkin' bottled water...you think...


Hollywood!


I know niggas........who say I'm gonna go all Hollywood on them once the name I go by, is known.  And I say, do NOT peg me for a shallowness I would never claim.  I do not subscribe to the hollowness of what the media says is celebrity.  I'll play the game enough to position myself to be able to call the shots I wanna call...and leave the rest to shallow muthafuckas to fight over.  I AM an artist.  I paint the canvas with characters I play when I'm cast in a role. I paint in very vivid hues.  I AM an artist.  I paint the canvas with words & lyrics that allows any random person to hold the mirror up to themselves...and maybe they can dissect themselves as I did when I took the time to carefully write the shit down.  There is no room for hollow halls to reside in my mind.  Period-point-blank, my mind is sharper than the sharpest ginsu.  Hollywood can be a slippery slope at times. That much I have learned. There is no courtesy from itz inhabitants. No one will open the door for you and say...


"Come on in Mr. Jey! We've be expecting you."


So...in the thick of the night, I lurk in the shadows.  Patiently waiting for the right moment.  The Wood is Hollow, indeed.  And when the moment is perfect, as stated by my Creator...in the words of the great Christopher Wallace, I will...


"Kick in the door, waving the 4-4."


Either that...or I slice my way thru...with the razor blade under my tongue.


*SCENE 3:   "Say No More Freestyle"

*TRACK:  Say You Will (Kanye West)


My collisions, deep inside this life and this time
Is like the war of Love and Hate, for control of my mind
And my left brain, shoots real rockets at my right
Right brain returns fire ta spark these thoughts in the night
When I tryda sleep...but I can't
Cuz insomnia is the canvas for vivid pictures I paint
Say you are but you ain't, on the level I dwell
Cuz my travels toss javelins that pierce the edges of hell
I could sell you my dreams, but you would bust at the seams
Then blame it on my name, like I pissed on the scenes
I'm kinda pissed cuz I mean, to be the best I can be
Swear, sometimes the ones who love me tryda take that from me
And I agree to disagree, that I'd be wrong if I leave
You can't price tag my time, and what the fuck, itz time to breathe
I'ma grieve for this hour, kinda sour how itz gone
But if it comes to dust, trust, we'll survive cuz we grown
Muthafuckas claim they know, what it takes to make it right
Same muthafuckas fake, when in the heat of the light
I can spit it in the mic, but rather spit it in yo ear
So you hear me loud and clear, i'd never live in my fear
I been 2 years running, from the sun of morning's ring
And stress dun started showing, so there headaches when I think
If the kids gotta suffer, then a change is truly due
I ain't scared to view my mirror, but itz reflecting you too
What the fuck I'm s'posed to do, if I ain't happy at home?
What the fuck would y'all cats do, if you were standing alone?
On the stage wit a page, of yo pain and yo pride
Tryna realize every dream, you ever had on this ride
If I abide by the rules, I fear my early demise
Thas my fore-sight of the future, seen it wit my own eyes
And I ain't blind to the fact, she ain't happy like me
She ain't said it to my face, amazing grace has a fee
And I don't feel free, I'm locked up inside my heart
If I repeat the fuckin' beats, I'm sure to fall apart
A part dazed a part distant, unamused by the tears
I'm sorry mama, swear I'm tryna re-reverse every year
The reverb's always near, I count cowards and sheep
I count dollars and weap, silently - before I sleep
Ahmir and Chy running deep, in my visions of wealth
But if I obliterate myself, thas no good for my health
Whus my shelf life like, am I deferring my dreams
Did I calculate the shit right, when I created this team
Dearly beloved, I'm tryna get it right in THIS life
Sometimes Love it turns to Hate it, sumthin gits sacrificed
And with this fuckin' ring, I thee wed all my sins
If we don't separate the ends, we may never be friends
Lord please forgive my bold face, delivery today
Never meant to make you sad, only meant to make a way
And I stood befor you and vowed, til my death
But if the shit don't fit, you must acquit my next step
Thankfully I haven't left, so my work here ain't done
So I'ma ask that You guide me right back to square one
Cuz my life ain't been fun and I been meaning to smile
Kinda hurts my mama said, I ain't smiled in awhile
And if this is the part, where we both break our hearts
Then all I ask is for the strength and a chance to restart

Amidst the chaotic realm, that my soul is entrenched
Inside my mind, where the star's been benched
And life's a bitch, that I really don't feel so rich
Like I'm the batter who can't hit a curveball pitched
Am I supposed to feel, like the robot I've become
Shiddd I been flying auto-pilot, and my soul dun gone numb
And I'm so, sick and tired of being tired and sick
Like I'm the number one pick, and you drafted my dick
And I regret what I swept, Jesus wept for my grace
But hail mary's fulla shit, thas been etched on my face
Just in case they wanna place, all the blame of the game
I'll rat race you rodents and call you "muthafuckas" the same
I'll slow chase you like prey, I ain't changing my lane
I'll control-alt-delete the fact you even saying my name
And itz a shame, that...I ain't made it yet
But when the time comes, watch for niggas placing they bets
On my MasterSpeak, deep from the depths of my mind
Where I'm searching for ANY piece of truth I can find
I ain't braille blind, ain't no Abu Ghraib on my eyes
I ain't hell bound, the devil can't sell me the lies
I'm the pot where, the chicken fries harder than thugs
But the plot's kinda thick, so they be crying for love
Fine line til itz hate, and your mate is obtuse
To the fact that I'm acute, and prone to reboot the AIR
Shooting flares like 380's, playing "Sadie" to soothe
The fact I care in my heart, but my soul needs sum proof
I take off my kool, and rewind every scene that I fear
Cuz I'm closer to my death than the breath of next year
And my breath's in a gear, fast pacing, racing
Prone to think quick/fast, bout the shit that I'm facing
Yep, itz Kanye's track, that I'm inclined to re-lacing
Lemme straighten out the Naps, tender heads start bracing
Am I hallucinating, I was contemplating my life
In sacrifice, suffice to say this beat equals my wife
Making love melodies, while I'm steady hating the price
Of love's lockdown, and I can't live this life twice
Going down's a vice, and I got a good grip
But reality starts to slip and I ain't taking this shit
No more, before, I was holding the door
But now the door's tryna slam, lemme settle my score
What the fuck you lookin' for, if yo eyes can't see
What you tryna listen for, if you can't hear me
Suffocating in degrees, nigga PLEASE pay the rent
Cuz the jaded side of mine says, all the money is spent
And the bitter side is fine, if the feelin's get pent
But the fatal flaw of lies, in the truth's got me bent
Like I'm fetal, in position, tryna climb IN the womb
Cuz it all goes dark, every time a bitch just assumes
And at times I be, blowing fumes
From a wet cigarette, til my lungs get consumed
And the sweat don't pour, it just rains from my veins
Try in vain to go insane, but God's making it plain
I can complain OR, I can change
But either way it goes, know my living is not in vain
I'ma, father my kids til I can't lead them no more
And the rest God Bless, there's better days in store
So I be, spitting flames
An emcee for higher, who ain't playing no game
Cuz life's what you really tryda make it in jist
Either I quit or I stand, and raise both of my fists
I could complain, or...I could just change
Either way itz s'posed to go, I ain't living in vain
I'ma father Chy and Ahmee til itz my time to go
And the rest is God Blessed, better days are in store
Say no more...


Copyright © 2010 by Monty Jey


-WhoIsMo.Jey...?®

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